Treatable Though Not Cureable

The return of Elizabeth Edward's breast cancer, so soon after a short remission, knocked the wind out of my family. We have not moved on to any opinions as to whether or not John Edwards should stay in the 2008 race for President. We're still wrestling with how and why this news affects us as it does.

We lost our mother to breast cancer nearly a year ago. Her almost annual biopsies (in the early days they were benign as she had fibrocystic breast disease) became routine to us until, after 15 years, she found a new lump. My father talked about it the other night.

"We were in bed and her hand dropped to her left breast. She touched it and said to me, "I have cancer. Feel this." They acted quickly and the lump was so small the radiologist said he didn't know how she found it. That early detection gave her 19 more years with us. When it returned it was aggressive and savage. She died within six months.

As a family, we have not come to terms with my mother's death. In fact, I'm not sure any one of us has come to terms individually. But, I know this. I won't judge the Edwards' decisions about whether he should run or how she has chosen to deal with her illness. I do know that each of the members of my family looks back on the last months -- and years -- of my mother's life and wish we'd done some things differently. I also know that what she'd say is that we shouldn't. That we should have no regrets. That we were human and did the best we could.

I think that's what it's like for the Edwards family. They are -- God bless them -- doing the best they can. I wish them well.